July 2005

Hitch

Hitch, even though predictable and somewhat cookie cutter, is funny, sensitive and an easy watch. Will Smith keeps the audience tickled and well entertained in this romantic romp. What else could we expect from the director of Fools Rush In, Ever After, and Sweet Home Alabama, but yet another funny romantic comedy, Andy Tennant’s girlfriend/wife is one lucky lady.

Hitch
3 Stars

Alex ‘Hitch’ Hitchens (Will Smith) plays a hip and suave “Date Doctor”, he helps not so lucky guys get the women of their dreams in only 3-dates. Using little quips of advice, similar to a guy’s version of The Rules book, Alex instructs like a coach getting a player ready for the big game. He instructs his clients to look for the signs when on a date; for example, when she is fidgeting with her keys, that means she wants a goodnight kiss or don’t go all the way for that kiss make her follow up the last 10%. Hitch instructs them in the ways of love and confidence; all a woman needs to fall in love is a man with loads of confidence.

Released on DVD June 14

His latest client, Albert Brennaman (Kevin James), an overweight nerdy accountant with a massive crush on a beautiful client, society heiress Allegra Cole (Amber Valletta), proves to be quite a challenge. The funny thing is, is that Allegra is just as geeky as Albert and they are a perfect match for each other, but Albert needs Hitch to give him the confidence to move forward and approach her. While assisting his biggest challenge, Hitch runs into another challenge, more like an uphill climb, he falls for a gossip columnist, Sara Melas (Eva Mendes)

At first Sara tries to play all-coy not acting too interested and really making Hitch put out a great deal of effort to court her. Finally succumbing to his charms, she agrees to go on a date, Hitch turns out to be a babbling idiot under her powers. He spends more time tripping over himself and stammering, Sara only finds this to be more attractive and powerless under his charms.

Of course there is a hiccup, it’s set up in the romantic comedy formula. Guy meets girl or girl meets guy, one likes the other but the other doesn’t, then after a period of acting like primates they fall in love, after the love comes hardship and then love again. Well in the case of Hitch, Sara runs into a guy that Hitch would not help, but he sets Hitch up for a fall. The guy she runs into has hurt her best friend and totally pushes it off onto Hitch’s advice, she gets even by slandering him in her gossip column. In the process of trying to get even with Hitch, Sara ends up hurting Albert and Allegra’s relationship. Albert is heart broken at first, but realizes he truly has the confidence to fix this one on his own and goes after Allegra and wins her back. Hitch, on the other hand, wallows in self-pity for a while quits his business and sets up to leave town. Right before he hits the door he is hit with a little bit of truth serum and runs out to beg for forgiveness from Sara. Honestly, I feel Sara owes him a big sorry, for all the junk she stirred up, but Hitch does the apologizing and wins Sara back. The End.

 

Hitch is an awesome date movie, good for an evening at home with some candle light, pizza and “the love doctor”. It will make you and your “special” someone laugh and giggle, Hitch is a real treat for a light evening.

Available on UMD Mini For PSP. It’s cool seeing Will Smith really tiny, but Hitch isn’t a film that should be seen in that small of a format. PSP owners might not be the type who goes around watching films like Hitch by themselves and if they do, they don’t admit to it.

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Bad News Bears (2005)

There are some changes here, the film is much more focused on the coach than the kids, but for the most part it stays true to the spirit of the original. So how is it? I loved Bad Santa and I’m a huge Linklater fan, but they were also saddled with a script which doesn’t have much to it; I didn’t know what to expect. What I got was kind of like a good piece of chewing gum. I enjoyed the flavor while it lasted, but when it was over I spit it out and moved on to find something to eat that would sustain me.

Bad News Bears
2 Stars

Though I enjoyed it, I’m not a huge fan of the original Bad News Bears.  So when I heard Billy Bob was going to star in a remake my initial response was—Why? There are some changes here, the film is much more focused on the coach than the kids, but for the most part it stays true to the spirit of the original. So how is it? I loved Bad Santa and I’m a huge Linklater fan, but they were also saddled with a script which doesn’t have much to it; I didn’t know what to expect. What I got was kind of like a good piece of chewing gum. I enjoyed the flavor while it lasted, but when it was over I spit it out and moved on to find something to eat that would sustain me.

Not too bad

Buttermaker (Billy Bob Thornton) is a drunken foul mouthed exterminator in Sun Valley.  Once, many years ago, he pitched two-thirds of an inning in the major leagues; this was by far the high point of his life.  Now he spends most of his time drinking, smoking, cussing, and dating local strippers.  For some extra cash he takes on the job of coach for a group of kids that were held out of the league but due to the zealousness of an one of the mothers (Marcia Gay Harden) have formed their own team.  The group includes a kid in a wheelchair, two twins who speak only Spanish, and a group that doesn’t know the difference between a baseball and a motzo ball.  So Buttermaker, when he’s not getting drunk and passing out on the pitcher’s mound, tries to help these kids learn to play and beat the favorites to win the championship who are coached by overbearing control freak Bullock (Greg Kinnear).  Our coach recruits his former step-daughter (Sammi Kraft) and local bad boy (Jeff Davies) to help round out his team.  You can probably guess what happens from here.

The film takes a few shots at those who coach and overbearing parents, but I would have preferred more.  Aside from the ringers Thornton gets to improve his team, most of the kids are interchangeable and you don’t get much of a feel for them.  You get a fat kid, a black kid, a ruffian, a wimp, a geek, a cripple, and so on, but they never really develop into any more than these threadbare generic characters.  The film spends most of its time on Thornton’s character.  This gives us most of the films funny moments, but you also tend to forget about half the kids on the team because they don’t get much camera time.  Nor is any foundation is laid to help you understand why these kids want to play baseball in the first place, especially since it seems many of them have never played in the past.  As for Thornton, his mood swings from mean spirited drunk to foolish but good hearted guy don’t always come off here; I guess the studio was afraid of him coming off as too mean or cruel.  Finally, while the film is funny and amusing it is mostly cheap laughs and crude humor that you can enjoy once, but is easily forgettable and would get old after a couple of viewings.

For me the remake has the same effect as the original.  You will laugh and enjoy it for what it is and then walk out of the movie and completely forget it.  While diverting and amusing there are no bust gut laughs or great scenes to discuss after the credits roll.  Was it okay, yeah.  Could it have been better, definitely.  You always are waiting for Thornton to go a step farther, but the studio’s mandatory PG-13 rating never lets him truly explore the character’s depth and depravity.  I would have much preferred a sequel to Bad Santa rather than try to balance Thornton being an ass and a good hearted guy at the same time, and allow the humor to go all out rather than being restrained at times.  If you are just looking for some fun foul mouthed entertainment for a couple of hours this summer you will probably enjoy yourself.  Just don’t expect more.

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Mo Cuishle vs The Italian Stallion

So I went to pick up my copy of Million Dollar Baby on DVD and just sitting there was the Special Edition DVD of Rocky.  What’s a guy to do?  So I ended up spending a night with two boxing films that took home the Oscar for Best Picture.  So let’s get ready for some boxin’!  In this corner we have the champion of boxing movies, the eternal underdog who makes good on his one shot, the Italian Stallion, Rocky Balboa.  And in the other corner we have the challenger, a woman from humble trailer park beginnings, trained by Dirty Harry, Mo Cuishle, Maggie Fitzgerald.  So which is the better DVD, it’s a close call, and sure to go the distance.  Read on dear viewer, read on.

Rocky and Million Dollar Baby
4 & 1/2 Stars

So I went to pick up my copy of Million Dollar Baby on DVD and just sitting there was the Special Edition DVD of Rocky.  What’s a guy to do?  So I ended up spending a night with two boxing films that took home the Oscar for Best Picture.  So let’s get ready for some boxin’!  In this corner we have the champion of boxing movies, the eternal underdog who makes good on his one shot, the Italian Stallion, Rocky Balboa.  And in the other corner we have the challenger, a woman from humble trailer park beginnings, trained by Dirty Harry, Mo Cuishle, Maggie Fitzgerald.  So which is the better DVD, it’s a close call, and sure to go the distance.  Read on dear viewer, read on.

Always protect yourself

Million Dollar Baby
Frankie Dunn (Clint Eastwood) was one of the best cut men in the boxing game.  Now he owns a gym with the help of his old-time friend Scrap (Morgan Freeman).  Frankie’s life is not a happy one.  He has an estranged daughter who he writes every week, but whose letters are always returned unopened.  He attends Catholic mass every day without fail as he is haunted by some past sin.  And he has lost his boxer to another manager who can guarantee him a title shot.  Into his life walks a thirty-one year old woman named Maggie Fitzgerald (Hillary Swank) who wants Frankie to train her and won’t take no for an answer.  Frankie isn’t interested in training a girl, but Maggie slowly starts to wear down his resolve.  Finally Frankie agrees and Maggie starts to live her dream in the ring. 

The movie is never about what you think its about.  It travels a winding road of subtle and abrupt turns, much like life.  This was by far the best of theatrical releases of 2004.  Besides Best Picture it won Eastwood a Best Director Oscar, Swank a Best Actress Oscar, and Freeman a Best Supporting Actor Oscar.  The films performances are just unbelievable, and Eastwood’s direction shows a style that doesn’t mind not showing or telling the audience everything, something I wish other current directors would learn from.  The world of Frankie and Maggie is filled with many odd and interesting stories that would be cut out of a lesser film.  The best of these are Danger (Jay Baruchel), a young man with absolutely no boxing talent who punches air around the gym and is constantly yelling out a challenge to fight Thomas “Hitman” Hearns, and Father Horvak (Brian F. O’Byrne) a preacher who Frankie torments on a daily basis with questions like “So is Jesus a Demigod?”  The films many plot turns and multiple stories are held together by Freeman’s low key narration which tells us as much about our characters as the sport of boxing.  Freeman effortlessly finds just the right notes for each scene and brings us fully into this world.

The two disc collection ($29.95) has some nice extras.  We are given two different documentaries, one on the producers and the production aspect of the film and a second documentary on the making of the film.  Both are well done.  The other extra is a short interview with Eastwood, Swank, and Freeman talking with James Lipton.  I have to admit being disappointed with this extra.  Lipton spends most of the interview plugging his own show and shamelessly kissing up to the actors; not much new stuff here especially if you have already seen Lipton interview these actors separately.  The movie’s trailer is also included.  The glaring oversight here is the lack of even a single commentary track, especially for a movie of this caliber in terms of acting, action sequences, and how the film is lit and shot.

Yo, Adrian!

Rocky
Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone) is a man with few positives in his life.  His boxing career is going nowhere, he’s got a dead-end job as a leg breaker for a small time mobster, his best friend Paulie (Burt Young) is a loudmouthed drunk whose sister Adrian (Talia Shire) won’t give him the time of day, and he’s just lost his locker at the local gym run by Mickey (Burgess Meredith).  Rocky is given his one shot at greatness when the opponent for the heavyweight champion Apollo Creed (Carl Weathers) backs out only five weeks before the fight leaving an opening for a no-name contender.  Rocky accepts Mickey as his manager, tries to win Adrian’s heart,  and trains for what will be his one chance to prove himself that he is more than just a bum.

The movie is less a story about a man’s chance at greatness than about a man proving his worth to himself.  Rocky never really considers he has a chance to win.  For him the victory is the chance to finish the fight still standing, to do what no one has been able to do and take Creed the distance.  Although there are several wonderful pieces here (directing, acting, cinema photography, score, fight sequences) this is Stallone’s shining moment.  The fact that he wrote this screenplay and held onto it until a studio was willing to let him play the lead role is a great Hollywood story.  The supporting cast is just terrific, and the fight sequences are as well filmed as anything you would see today.  You also get a strong feel for the town of Philadelphia which would be played on further in the sequels.

The Special Edition ($14.95) is chocked full of goodies.  First, we get a commentary track that includes director John G Avildsen, producers Irwin Winkler and Robert Chartoff, and actors Talia Shire, Burt Young, and Carl Weathers.  The only one missing here is Stallone himself.  There is also a short “video commentary” with Stallone that is really more of an interview with intercut scenes, but is still very good.  Aside from the commentary we get a short documentary from the director which goes into detail of how the fight scenes were shot and actually takes a look at some of the original 8mm footage that was used, trailers and television spots, a short tribute to Burgess Meredith, and a short tribute to the cinema photographer James Crabe.  Really stocked full of great stuff here for just a one disc DVD.

No knockout here folks, so we have to go to the ref’s scorecards for the decision.  I think both of these are worthy DVDs to add to any collection, but if you had to pick one only….well that’s a tough one.  For half the cost and more extras including commentary I’m inclined to go with Rocky rather than Million Dollar Baby, although I honestly don’t think you could go wrong either way.  Both are boxing movies, but neither is solely about boxing.  The main characters in each are searching for their place in the world and in the ring, and they both are given a shot late in the life of their careers to succeed when no one thinks they can.  These are stories about people whose lives have threatened to pass them by and are given one chance to prove that they can succeed and prove their worth.

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Me and You and Everyone We Know Is Magical

Performance artist Miranda July writes and directs her first feature film
Christine (Miranda July), part-time video artist, part-time elder care driver takes one of her clients shopping for shoes and spies the love of her life, the wide-eyed, newly separated, shoe salesman, Richard (John Hawkes, Deadwood). She knows nothing about his life, but, she is in love and determined in her quest of him, almost to the point of seeming like a stalker, a benign stalker.

Richard, still healing from many wounds, one self-inflicted (he purposely pours lighter fluid on his hand, lights it on fire and seems surprised that he is burning) and his emotional wounds. He is trying to start a new life without his wife, in a cramped apartment, with two sons, preteen Peter (Miles Thompson) and grade school age, Bobby (Brandon Radcliffe), both of whom are like strangers to him. They are silent in their anger and have shut him out of their lives. They prefer to connect and communicate with strangers in online chat rooms, playing the game of not being themselves, online, just like adults.
Young neighbor and school mate of Peter, Slyvie (the excellent Carlie Westerman) is obsessed with order and buying household items for her dowry. Her happiness comes from connecting with neatly ironed towel sets and the latest kitchen gadget, dreaming of her perfect future. She has connected with her soul mate and doesn’t know it.
Two, much too adult, fourteen year old neighbor girls, Heather (Natasha Slayton) and Rebecca (Najarra Townsend) find their connections by teasing Richard’s co-worker, Andrew (busy character actor Brad William Henke) to the point of where he leaves them explicit messages, taped to his living room window. In their quest to find out which one on them is better at fellatio, they capture and use a strangely detached Peter for their own version of a double-blind study. No doubt this scene will make some uncomfortable in its frank look at the activities of today’s sexually aware, but still naïve, youth.
All of these different narratives and more mix, match and intersect to tell an off-beat love story.

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Charlie & The Chocolate Factory

Tim Burton returns to the world of Roal Dahl for a swing at Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, but bigger budgets (and bigger stars) don’t always equal bigger thrills and more engaging story.  While it’s a little more faithful to the original story, Burton’s need to push the weirdness eventually alienates us from the experience, which is handled with none of the awe and joy of the original.  Depp makes Wonka a stunted man-child rather than just a wildly eccentric man, which serves to make the film much like the confections of the story: sweet and enjoyable, but ultimately forgettable.

Charlie & The Chocolate Factory
3 Stars

Retooling a much beloved (if flawed) film is touchy business in any regard, but there are not many films as sacred to a generation as Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory. Having Tim Burton and Johnny Depps’ names attached may have lessened the worry factor, but Gene Wilder all but immortalized the role of Willy Wonka in the 1971 film version.

So how does Burton’s version hold up? It’s both better and not as good, to tell the truth.

In this adaptation (which is admittedly more faithful to Roald Dahl’s classic novel) we’re given a more complete look at Charlie (Freddie Highmore from “Finding Neverland”;) and his down-on-their-luck family as they eek by a tenuous existence in a ramshackle and leaning home. Charlie’s parents (Noah Taylor & Helena Bonham Carter) have to support both Charlie and two sets of grandparents (David Kelly, Elieen Essell, David Morris, and Liz Smith. All of whom manage to steal every scene they’re in), while trying to maintain high spirits and encourage their young son.

When the mysterious candy maker Willy Wonka (Depp) announces a contest wherein five lucky children will be allowed to tour his incredible factory, Charlie knows he has no chance of winning, as he’s only able to afford one chocolate bar a year. Any takers on whether Burton derails the universe by having Charlie lose out on a golden ticket? Yah, I didn’t think so.

Charlie and his Grandpa Joe (Kelly) get their chance to visit the Wonka Factory, alongside the gluttonous Gloops (Philip Wiegratz and Franziska Troegner), the overachieving Beauregardes (Annasophia Robba and the creepily great Missi Pyle), video-game fanatic Mike Teavee (Jordan Fry, who looks like a minature Barry Pepper) and his hapless dad, and of course Veruca Salt (Julia Winter) and her over-indulgent father (the great James Fox), each of whom is summarily dispatched by their own faults (with a little neglect and encouragement from Wonka) to the accompaniment of the song stylings of the Oompa Loompas (Deep Roy).

With the exception of a wonderfully morose back-story for Wonka, Charlie & the Chocolate Factory does do an admirable job of keeping faithful to the story’s origins, but strangely this film turns out much more light-hearted than the 1971 version. For all the technical achievements and storytelling improvements, this version also lacks a lot of the warmth and wonder of the original. We’re shown various wild contraptions, each making candy in a seemingly impossible way, but rather than focusing on the wonderment and awe they should inspire, each set piece feels more like background images which are given only cursory examination.

Charlie is much less an active protagonist once the factory doors are opened, pushed aside by the more colorful and obnoxious children on the screen. He’s there only to serve as a moral barometer and to reinforce the wonder of the Wonka experience. And of course there’s Wonka himself. Depp had some extremely large shoes to fill with this role, but rather than attempt to capture the benevolent lunacy of Wilder’s take, here Wonka is more an arrested man-child whose creepy mannerisms aren’t just some mischievous facade, but a reflection of a truly stunted being. With his CGI pasty face and flat out childlike manners, there’s no possible way his performance isn’t meant to conjure up a Jacko association.

Sadly, this time Wonka never really warms up to the world. True to Burton form, his weirdness is unchanged and uncompromised from our first encounter, much like the film itself. The real failing in this film is that it never finds a way to open up to the audience, as it’s too wrapped up in its own world to let us in for more than a peek. While many, many elements of this film easily surpass the original, the childlike wonder and sense of exploration are sorely lacking.

Still, even die-hard fans will find much to enjoy this time around, and only time will tell if this more modern adaptation will capture the imagination of this generation.

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