DVD Reviews 

Holmes & Watson

by Alan Rapp on July 10, 2019

in DVD Reviews 

  • Title: Holmes & Watson
  • IMDb: link

Holmes & Watson Blu-ray reviewHolmes & Watson sets a new bar for the worst Sherlock Holmes adaption ever made. It’s likely it will keep that honor for several years, if not decades. Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly don’t so much play Sherlock Holmes and Dr. James Watson as reprise their roles from Step-Brothers playacting what they mistakenly believe 19th Century versions of the characters must have been like.

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The Beast in Heat

by Alan Rapp on July 8, 2019

in DVD Reviews 

  • Title: The Beast in Heat
  • IMDb: link

The Beast in Heat Blu-ray reviewWhen you are looking at a film where the director and 90% of the cast refused to put their real names on the project, you know you found something pretty awful. An Naziploitation film co-written and directed by Luigi Batzella, under the pseudonym Ivan Kathansky, the film centers around the comings and goings around a Nazi POW camp during WWII where a mad scientist (Macha Magall) has created a human beast (Salvatore Baccaro). Apparently the Nazis have decided the best way to win over the locals is for the Beast to rape them into submission.

There’s nothing of merit and little of interest here. The film is a bizarre mix of unintentional camp mixed with gore, torture, shootings, and rape sequences. There’s also a subplot involving locals looking to derail the Nazi war effort who become prisoners the Dr. Kratsch (Magall) as well. Had the film thoroughly embraced its ridiculous nature and gone full camp it may have been semi-passable as a guilty pleasure. As is, it’s hardly watchable.

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Batman vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

by Alan Rapp on June 14, 2019

in DVD Reviews 

  • Title: Batman vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
  • IMDb: link

Batman vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Blu-ray reviewAdapted from the comic book mini-series, Batman vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles brings the Teenage Mutant Turtles to Gotham City on the trail of the Shredder (Andrew Kishino) and the Foot Clan who are on a crime spree which Batman (Troy Baker) has just become aware. The movie offers the obligatory misunderstanding pitting Batman versus the Turtles for a time before realizing they are both on the same side and need to team-up to stop Shredder and his new business partner Ra’s al Ghul (Cas Anvar) who plans to use the Ooze to destroy Gotham.

While the animation isn’t quite up to snuff with some of DC’s better animated movies, I do appreciate the story sticking with Batman’s classic design and the look of both the Shredder and Ra’s al Ghul work pretty well (even if I can’t say the same for some of Batman’s other villains who are brought into the plot when Ra’s mutates Arkham Asylum as a distraction for Batman and Turtles). Some of the mutations work better than others (such as the joke made at Poison Ivy‘s expense).

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1982 – Conan the Barbarian

by Alan Rapp on May 16, 2019

in DVD Reviews 

  • Title: Conan the Barbarian
  • IMDb: link

Conan the Barbarian reviewToday’s Throwback Thursday takes us back to harsh lands of Cimmeria, the days of high adventure, and a barbarian known as Conan. On or around this date 37 years ago Arnold Schwarzenegger hit the big screen in the first of several iconic roles which would transform the former body builder into a movie star. Based on the character and stories created by Robert E. Howard, Conan the Barbarian offers an origin story for a barbarian thief raised in slavery and his quest to avenge the death of his parents by the wizard Thulsa Doom (James Earl Jones).

More one-dimensional than his comic counterpart, this Conan lacks the wit found on the printed page as he stumbles through the various obstacles put in front of him. From his journey of slave, to gladiator, to wandering barbarian, Conan picks up companions in the beautiful Valeria (Sandahl Bergman), the wizard Akiro (Mako), and the archer Subotai (Gerry Lopez). The film is hardly the stuff of great cinema, and some of its elements and effects have aged better than others, but more than three decades later it still retains its charm (including Jones’ reptilian villain turn, some enjoyable action sequences, and the memorable score by Basil Poledouris).

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Bumblebee

by Alan Rapp on April 15, 2019

in DVD Reviews 

  • Title: Bumblebee
  • IMDb: link

Bumblebee movie reviewLook at that, a Transformers movie that doesn’t completely suck. While throwing caution to the wind and creating plenty of continuity errors with the current Transformers movie franchise, Bumblebee is a mix of old school Transformers and the suckage known as the Michael Bay films that forces a human story into the center of each film. Easily the best of the franchise, that’s still not saying all that much. Still, for what it is, Bumblebee provides some fun.

Opening on Cybertron, the story shoehorns in several fan-favorite cameos, while explaining Bumblebee‘s arrival on Earth and the loss of his voice. Taking place before the events of the first Bay Transformers movie, Bumblebee is centered around a tomboy named Charlie (Hailee Steinfeld) who discovers her clunker of a VW Bug is actually a robot from space. Sent to Earth to prepare it for the Autobots arrival (something he actually doesn’t do), Bumblebee is followed by Decepticons searching for Optimus Prime (Peter Cullen) and the rest of the Autobots. The film also throws in John Cena as a soldier in a secret government organization conned by the Decepticons into locating their prey.

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