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Chip ‘n’ Dale: Rescue Rangers

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  • Title: Chip ‘n’ Dale: Rescue Rangers (2022)
  • IMDb: link

More than once while watching Chip ‘n’ Dale: Rescue Rangers I wondered to myself who this movie is for? The short-lived TV-series which ran from 1989-1990 gets a reboot of sorts here in a bizarre set up which mergers two-dimensional animated characters, three-dimensional CGI characters, and real actors. It’s kind of like Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, in terms of setup and a mystery to be solved, except it never finds a way to blend its various elements into a cohesive whole.

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Firestarter

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  • Title: Firestarter (1984)
  • IMDb: link

With the release of a new adaptation of Stephen King’s novel, Flashback Friday takes a look back at 1984’s Firestarter starring a young Drew Barrymore as a child with the power to start fires with her mind. Definitely of its time, the 80s adaptation would likely be totally forgotten except for Barrymore’s involvement. To be fair, the goofy plot doesn’t fit the rather straightforward telling of a man (David Keith) and his wife (Heather Locklear in limited screen time) experimented on in college by a secret government organization who have passed on even stronger powers to their young daughter.

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Black Site

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  • Title: Black Site
  • IMDb: link

Have you ever watched a movie where your primary reaction is feeling sorry for everyone involved in the project? I know actors need to work to pay their bills, but surely everyone here could have found something more dignified. Perhaps porn or selling autographs at a fifth-rate convention? Really anything would have been better than Black Site.

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Uncharted

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  • Title: Uncharted
  • IMDb: link

Despite its title, Uncharted takes us on a journey of well-trod treasure hunting involving Nate Drake (Tom Holland) being pulled into a search for the legendary lost treasure of Magellan which he and his brother once fantasized about finding as kids. Teamed up with various untrustworthy and unscrupulous hunters, each after the treasure for their own reasons, Uncharted follows the basic path of the genre with various clues needing to be solved to move the characters to the next step on their journey to the treasure.

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The Magic Sword

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  • Title: The Magic Sword
  • IMDb: link

The goofy 60s fantasy film The Magic Sword stars Gary Lockwood as an orphan raised by a sorceress (Estelle Winwood) who steals a number of magical gifts from his foster mother to save the princess (Anne Helm) he’s fallen in love with from afar when she is abducted by an evil sorcerer (Basil Rathbone) who has a habit of kidnapping princesses and feeding them to his dragon. Armed with a magic sword, armor, and steed, along with chivalrous knights, Sir George begins his quest to fight through the seven curses put in place by the sorcerer while also dealing with a traitor in his midst.

The magical effects, as you may guess, are pretty limited for the time and haven’t aged that well, likely one of the reasons the movie earned a spot on Mystery Science Theater 3000 (although two of the characters admitted it was better than they expected).

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