Romance

Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down!

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  • Title: Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down!
  • IMDb: link

Victoria Abril stars as a former porn actress attempting to transition to mainstream films in the final project of the smitten renown director Máximo Espejo (Francisco Rabal) whose lust for the actress is the worst kept secret on set. Our other main character is recently-released mental patient Ricky (Antonio Banderas) obsessed with Marina who kidnaps the actress in hopes of making her fall in love with him. Keeping her bound to the bed, Ricky takes no physical advantage while also attending to her needs including procuring drugs to help with her toothache. However, there is no debate that she is his prisoner.

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The Valet

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  • Title: The Valet
  • IMDb: link

Valet is an odd film for a romantic comedy. Rather than having two people fall head-over-heels for each other, the 2022 film is about how the time two strangers spend together teaches each of them to stay away from the people that are wrong for them. We start, not surprisingly, with a contrived situation in which, to protect her secret tryst with a married man (Max Greenfield), Olivia (Samara Weaving) convinces a valet named Antonio (Eugenio Derbez) to pretend to be the starlet’s new boyfriend in hopes of putting the paparazzi off the real story.

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D.E.B.S.

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  • Title: D.E.B.S.
  • IMDb: link

Giving off strong Disney Channel TV-movie vibes, 2004’s D.E.B.S. offers a campy teen spy story most notable for its central Romeo and Juliet star-crossed lovers romance being set between two young women on opposite sides of the law. Sara Foster stars as Amy Bradshaw, the star pupil at the clandestine academy for young women (recruited from secret SAT questions designed to uncover those with the aptitude for espionage) training them in Discipline, Energy, Beauty, and Strength.

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Fifty Shades of Wuthering Heights

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Wuthering Heights (2026)
  • IMDb: link

Emerald Fennell‘s adaptation of Emily Brontë‘s Wuthering Heights focuses primarily on the incestuous and destructive relationship between spoiled aristocrat Cathy (Margot Robbie and Charlotte Mellington) and her boorish and emotionally abusive adopted brother Heathcliff (Jacob Elordi and Owen Cooper) who her louse of a father (Martin Clunes) rescued one night on one of his drunken benders (providing someone to take out his aggression on over the coming years).

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Sisterhood, Inc.

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  • Title: Sisterhood, Inc.
  • IMDb: link

Despite equal parts makeover and romcom, Sisterhood, Inc. is no She’s All That. After being ousted from the company she founded, and desperately in need of a project, Megan (Rachael Leigh Cook) recruits a board of life coaches (Rosa Gilmore, Steve Schirripa, Jackie Hoffman, and Leonidas Gulaptis) to fix the life of her screw-up younger sister Izzy (Daniella Monet).

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