The Pirate’s Gold

by December Lambeth on July 6, 2006

in Top Tens & Lists

The early 80’s gave loose to many pirate films, from the funny and classic Princess Bride to the campy and silly The Pirate Movie. Many of the films created for high sea adventures in the 80’s aren’t all that bad, even if they were a bit cheesy and over the top. It was the 80’s after all; the era of big hair, leg warmers, mini-skirts with lace, “The Brat Pack” and some really crappy one hit wonders. What else would you expect from a bundle of pirate films from way back when?

But why stop there, now we have the new and improved pirate films, Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl, Dead Man’s Chest and whatever they are calling part 3.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl – Surprise, here is a film based on an attraction ride and it works. Funny, adventurous, action and a bit of romance, Curse of the Black Pearl is worth owning. Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom and Kira Knightley work perfect together in this swashbuckling deep sea adventure. Keep your fingers crossed and check out our review of Dead Man’s Chest on Friday, lets hope it’s as good as the first.

Cutthroat Island – Geena Davis as the rough and tumble female pirate Morgan Adams and Matthew Modine (anybody remember him?) as the suave lying cheat, William Shaw. Small adventure dealing with pieces of a family pirate map and a hidden treasure. This family is willing to slit each other’s throats for a piece of the map and Morgan is no exception. She takes control of all pieces and recovers the treasure for her and her crew. Along the way a little romance and adventure takes place between Morgan and William. Pretty campy and very over the top, Cutthroat Island is a pirate film you can live with out.

Princess Bride – Every child and adult should see this film. The Princess Bride is sweet and enduring as a grandpa (Peter Falk) reads to his sick grandson (Fred Savage) about a love story between a poor farmboy, Westley (Cary Elwes) and Princess Buttercup (Robin Wright Penn). Full of actors, adventure, magic and movie quotes, Princess Bride can be watched over and over again, it’s timeless. Does anybody remember the quote, “My name is Inigo Montoya, you’ve killed my father, prepare to die.”?

Hook – Hook is yet another of many Peter Pan remakes, but it is one of the first. Well done and fairly entertaining Robin Williams, Dustin Hoffman and Julia Roberts are quite the trio when it comes to Peter, Hook and Tinkerbell. Nothing essential about Hook stands out, it’s a well made film that’s fairly easy to watch at least once.

Yellowbeard – Yellowbeard is freaking awesome, a laugh out loud riot from 1983, with a mix of adventure, pirates, silly humor, Cheech and Chong, add a dash of Mel Brooks (no he didn’t create it, but just add the dash) and certainly a bit of Monty Python. You can’t help, but laugh. It’s completely silly and nonsensical. You would never believe that the director has done Charmed and Lois & Clark since his early 80’s glory days.

Ice Pirates – It takes a special breed to enjoy Ice Pirates, I loved it. Silly and completely off the hook, Ice Pirates fails as a film in every way possible, but it’s a riot to watch. Totally nonsensical and outlandish, from space herpes to dirty vulgar jokes, it hits the mark in low budget film making. In the future we run out of water and a rough and roudy crew of space pirates are out to find the planet that still has plenty.

The Pirate Movie – It’s a pirate musical from the early 80’s with non-other than Kristy McNichol and Christopher Atkins. Every young girl’s dream, the nerd, Mabel (Kristy McNichol) gets the hot young pirate, Frederic (Christopher Atkins) and everybody has a happy ending. All hail the Pirate King! With a joke here and there toward films before it’s time, like Star Wars, it’s pure campiness good times.

The Goonies – “Hey You Guys!” This film is a classic for any age. A group of kids head out to find a pirate’s booty and save their town. Along the way they run into a family of robbers who broke out of jail and are trying to print their own money instead of stealing it. The kids find the secret passage via a treasure map found in the attic and have the bad guys close on their tails as they hunt for the loot.

I’ve just metioned, but a very few when it comes to high seas adventures in film. There are many others like Pirates, Pirates of Penzance, Robinson Crusoe, Blackbeard the Pirate, Nate and Hayes, Shipwrecked just to name a few more.

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