2.5 Razors

Obliterated – Real American Heroes

  • Title: Obliterated – Real American Heroes
  • IMDb: link

Obliterated - Real American Heroes

The first episode of Obliterated tells us everything to know about the characters and the series which apparently both have the same stunted level of intelligence. Our main characters are a cobbled together special ops team run by CIA Agent Ava Winters (Shelley Hennig). If your wondering how the show gets around the CIA running domestic ops… well, it basically just ignores the fact that they are a foreign intelligence service and is barred from anything remotely like what Obliterated gives us (or even a halfway rational version of events depicted). Could Obliterated be dumb fun? Possibly, although there’s certainly more dumb than fun in this first episode.

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Candy Cane Lane

  • Title: Candy Cane Lane
  • IMDb: link

Candy Cane Lane

Candy Cane Lane is a throwaway Christmas flick with a family-friendly Eddie Murphy starring as an recently laid off salesman obsessed with winning his California neighborhood’s house decoration contest (even as he should be thinking about putting away money to pay his bills). This is the least edgy movie Eddie Murphy has ever made. In fact, it may be the least edgy movie anyone has ever made. Every aspect from Murphy to Ken Marino as the dicksish neighbor who is actually a not dickish at all and a pretty good neighbor, is as bland as can be.

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In Love and Deep Water

  • Title: In Love and Deep Water
  • IMDb: link

In Love and Deep Water

Set on a cruise ship, In Love and Deep Water merges a romcom about a pair of jilted lovers who come together after realizing their significant others are cheating with a murder mystery aboard the ship. The romcom angle works fairly well with the life of the buttoned-down butler (Ryô Yoshizawa) thrown into chaos after the arrival of Chizuru (Aoi Miyazaki) who showed up to catch her boyfriend and Suguru’s girlfriend together only to realize to late that the pair aren’t on the ship and finding herself stuck on the cruise for several days. The pair bond over both their misfortune and investigating the murder which occurs on the ship (which is where the film runs into problems).

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Next Goal Wins

  • Title: Next Goal Wins
  • IMDb: link

Next Goal Wins

Based on a true story of a washed-up soccer coach exiled across the world and tasked with turning around the worst international soccer team in the world after their historic loss 31-0 on the world stage, Next Goal Wins is pretty much what you would expect following in the footsteps of films such as Cool Runnings, A League of Their Own, or The Mighty Ducks… just not as good.

While perfectly acceptable as family friendly TV entertainment for something like The Hallmark Channel, Next Goal Wins lacks the heart of a champion and is more notable for Kaimana‘s role portraying Jaiyah Saelua, the first openly non-binary and trans woman to compete in a FIFA World Cup qualifier, than the story of the coach (who does little on-screen to teach soccer and whose motivations seem to come and go when the film needs them to without ever providing any proper motivation to change his attitude towards himself, his situation, or the team).

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Batman #139

Batman #139

Taking place after the events of The Gotham War, Bruce Wayne is isolated from the rest of the Bat-Family working on his own while struggling to keep the influence of Batman of Zur-En-Arrh from affecting his actions. The new trouble for Batman comes with the Joker teasing his old foe with Riddler-like clues while hoping to release the more murderous personality from Bruce Wayne’s subconscious.

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