2 Razors – Page 32 – RazorFine Review

Lara Croft: Tomb Raider

Alan Rapp / March 13, 2018 / Home Video

Title: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider
IMDb: link

With the character’s return to the big screen on Friday, this week’s throwback Tuesday takes us back to 2001’s big-screen adaptation of the Tomb Raider video game starring Angelina Jolie as English archaeologist Lara Croft. The plot centers around a mysterious artifact found in the Croft mansion, hidden inside an antique clock that begins ticking one fateful night. The artifact turns out to be tied to Lara’s missing father (Jon Voight) and the Illuminati who want to use it to gain control of time. Breaking into her insanely well-guarded home, equally insanely-prepared mercenaries make off with the key and begin a race to find the Triangle of Light which was broken in half centuries ago but with the key can be used to control time itself.

Incredibly goofy, even for a movie based off a video game, the film is largely forgettable other than for its star, ridiculous plot holes (such as granting Lara the chance to destroy half of the clock and essentially end the villains’ plans fairly early on but having her refuse to do so), and overly-elaborate sequences. Iain Glen and Daniel Craig star as the villains while Noah Taylor and Chris Barrie provide Lady Croft minimal technical support and back-up.

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Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. – All the Comforts of Home

Alan Rapp / March 5, 2018 / Television Reviews

Title: Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. – Together or Not at All
wiki: link

Despite having made it back to the present Phil Coulson (Clark Gregg) and his team appear to be still stuck in the inevitable timeloop of the Earth’s destruction and surrender to the Kree Empire. Aside from the authorities, there’s also a death squad after the remaining agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. inexplicably led by General Hale‘s (Catherine Dent) bitchy teenage daughter Ruby (Dove Cameron). The final scene’s reveal of the fact is surprising, but more from a WTF is going on perspective than any kind of clever reveal through good writing.

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Annihilation

Alan Rapp / February 22, 2018 / Movie Reviews

Title: Annihilation
IMDb: link

I love Ex Machina (enough to name it my favorite film of 2015), but holy hell is director Alex Garland‘s follow-up project a clusterfuck. Based on the novel of the same name by Jeff VanderMeer, Annihilation focuses on a biologist and former soldier (Natalie Portman) who chooses to journey into a rainbow-curtain rift (referred to as a shimmer) with four other female scientists (Jennifer Jason Leigh, Gina Rodriguez, Tuva Novotny, and Tessa Thompson) in hopes of understanding what is happening inside and what the anomaly did to her husband (Oscar Isaac) who was the only soldier sent from any of the previous expeditions to make it out alive.

Although hardly original, the film starts out with an interesting enough premise. Some of this is fulfilled within the group’s early moments inside the altered reality, although the existence and nature of it also creates several of the film’s biggest plot problems. Existing and expanding for three years, viewable by satellite, radar, and the human eye, and having swallowed up whole towns that had to be evacuated, we are led to believe the somehow the military has kept the existence of this anomaly secret from the world the entire time? Seriously?

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Still Pitchy, and Far From Perfect

Alan Rapp / December 21, 2017 / Movie Reviews

Title: Pitch Perfect 3
IMDb: link

Screenwriters Kay Cannon and Mike White bend over backwards the third time around to find a plausible reason to reunite the Barden Bellas for a final chance to sing and compete for glory. Given the glut of game shows which are music-based it would seem pretty easy to do. However, Pitch Perfect 3 goes old school and instead sends our ladies overseas to perform on a USO tour for American servicemen abroad. And, because everything in this series has to be about competition, the Bellas are pitted against the other bands competing for an opening act spot for prestigious musician DJ Khaled (playing himself).

Most of the cast return including the talented Becca Anna Kendrick, the awkward and all-the-sudden less-sexually-confused Chloe (Brittany Snow), the competitive Aubrey (Anna Camp), the younger Emily (Hailee Steinfeld), the odd Lilly (Hana Mae Lee), and the annoying Fat Amy (Rebel Wilson) who gets her own bizarre subplot involving a long-lost father (John Lithgow) and gangsters… for the micro-audience of those waiting to see Rebel Wilson as a ninja? Elizabeth Banks and John Michael Higgins also reprise their roles as commentators, this time tracking the group overseas for a documentary which would seem to have a very narrow target audience as well.

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Despicable Me 3

Alan Rapp / December 7, 2017 / Home Video

Title: Despicable Me 3
IMDb: link

The fourth movie of the Despicable Me franchise is the weakest and most disappointing (and that’s from someone who enjoyed Minions!). Screenwriters Cinco Paul and Ken Daurio go through the motions putting Gru (Steve Carell) back in the life of crime (but not really) with the twin brother he never knew (and who is even a worse villain than Dru).

Other than Minions, this is the first of the franchise that doesn’t put Gru’s relationship with his three adopted daughters front-and-center. Instead, the girls are thrown into a subplot involving Lucy (Kristen Wiig) struggling with her new role as a mother. As to the franchise lovable henchmen, the Minions meander around for much of the script in their own subplot which never goes anywhere all that interesting.

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