Thriller

All Good Things

  • Title: All Good Things
  • IMDB: link

Although the film is based on the real events surrounding the life of Robert Durst, the main problem with the screenplay by Marcus Hinchey and Marc Smerling is how ridiculous the events appear when recreated on film.

What starts as a love story and tense drama about a troubled son of a real estate broker devolves into a thriller. Then the thriller turns into the kind of cinematic disaster nobody wants on their resume. All Good Things may be based on a real story but it plays like bad fiction.

There’s something off about David Marks (Ryan Gosling) the first time we meet him, but that’s not enough to stop the charming Katie (Kirsten Dunst) from falling for him. Needled by his father’s (Frank Langella) disapproval David and Katie leave the tranquil health food store in Vermont so David can act as the bagman for the family business collecting cash from various seedy Times Square enterprises which the Marks famly owns.

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Salt

  • Title: Salt
  • IMDB: link

Originally intended as a vehicle for Tom Cruise Salt was shelved and then given an impromptu sex change operation to ready the way for Angelina Jolie to headline the shoot ’em up. When your leading man becomes a leading lady the original script by Kurt Wimmer (Ultraviolet , Street Kings) had to be rewritten by Brian Helgeland (Conspiracy Theory, Assassins, Man on Fire), and director Philip Noyce (The Bone Collector, Clear and Present Danger) was tasked to make it all work. That’s an awful lot of time and effort to put into a project well before shooting was scheduled to begin. Too bad it wasn’t worth it.

Angelina Jolie stars as CIA Agent Evelyn Salt, a fugitive on the run after being accused, by the questionalbe word of a dying former Russian spy (Daniel Olbrychski ), of being part of a top secret Russian sleeper cell doomsday scenario more than three decades in the making.

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Chloe is far less erotic and thrilling than you were hoping

  • Title: Chloe
  • IMDb: link

“I try to find something to love in everybody. Even if it’s a small thing.”

What makes a good erotic thriller? The simplest method I’ve found is what I call “the giggle test.” If either or both the dramatic and sexually-charged scenes of a movie make you giggle (or groan) it fails the test. An erotic thriller that makes you guffaw uncontrollably may become a cult classic (see Showgirls) but a slight giggle or two means only mild amusement at best (and only at the expense of those on screen). Chloe doesn’t pass the test.

One might expect, given the cast at his disposal and experience in this genre, director Atom Egoyan (Where the Truth Lies, Exotica) fully capable of adapting the French erotic thriller Nathalie… for American audiences. One would be wrong.

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Ninja Assassin

  • Title: Ninja Assassin
  • IMDB: link

At a time when Hollywood seems dead set on giving movies bloodless one and two-word titles that don’t give you a clue as to what the movie is about comes a film called Ninja Assassin. It’s about ninjas who kill people. Finally, a little truth in advertising.

For more than 1,000 years, nine ninja clans have been stealing orphan children under the age of 10 and training them in the art of assassination. For centuries, these clans have sold their services to wealthy individuals, companies, and governments for the cost of 100 lbs. of gold.

When a Europol researcher (Naomie Harris) uncovers their secret, she puts herself and her supervisor (Ben Miles) in danger. This also causes an outcast of the Ozunu Clan named Raizo (Rain) to come to her aid. With her help, Raizo plans to take down the clans and settle a personal grudge with his former master (Sho Kosugi).

Over the course of the film, we learn more about Raizo’s past, his training, his reason for leaving the clan, and the driving force behind his battle to destroy them.

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Whiteout

  • Title: Whiteout
  • IMDB: link

whiteout-posterAlthough Whiteout was slightly better than I expected, the film is nothing more than your basic thriller complete with a masked killer, a plucky detective with hidden scars, dangerous situations (most of which could be avoided the slightest hint of common sense), and a late plot twist which is far less surprising than it’s expected to be.

Kate Beckinsale stars as US Marshall Carrie Stetko. Due to an unfortunate case in her past, which we are given glimpses of in flashbacks, Carrie transferred as far from the action as possible. For years she has been the law in the icy wilderness of Antarctica where nothing ever happens.

Until now! Cue the suspenseful music.

Only days before her vacation, when the last planes will leave the Antarctic station for winter, a body is discovered. Carrie will have to put her past behind her and with the help of her doctor friend (a gruffy looking Tom Skerritt) and an agent from the United Nations (Gabriel Macht) she’ll try to find a killer from among the small population of the research station.

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