2.5 Razors

Marry Me

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Marry Me
  • IMDb: link

With a pair of likable stars and a braindead romcom plot, Marry Me is pretty much exactly what you would expect. The unlikley pairing between celebrity Kat Valdez (Jennifer Lopez) and schoolteacher Charlie Gibert (Owen Wilson) comes about through convoluted means when his friend (Sarah Silverman) drags him to Kat’s live concert where her live engagement goes sideways due to her fiancé’s (Maluma) infidelity and she marries a random member of the audience instead.

The saving grace to balance the inherit weakness to the plot is the charm of the two stars. And Lopez and Owens are good here as characters who seem smarter than to get themselves mixed up in such a ridiculous circumstance. An American version of Notting Hill with a heavy amount of social media and brand perception thrown in, Marry Me is far from a must-see, but if you are forced to sit down for a romcom, you could certainly do worse.

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Naomi – Enigma

/ / Television Reviews
  • Title: Naomi – Enigma
  • wiki: link

After discovering that her parents knew she arrived from another world, Naomi McDuffie (Kaci Walfall) sets out to learn as much about her murky origins as possible. The flashbacks to “Enigma” are underwhelming to say the least, especially compared to how the reveal works in the original comics. I’m not sure if Naomi’s parents are still hiding more details from her (like say one of her parents also not being from this world) or if the episode’s writing is simply substandard and will continue to recon story and plot at random as the series has done repeatedly since the first episode to offer underwhelming reveals.

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Death on the Nile

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Death on the Nile (2022)
  • IMDb: link

Writer/director/star Kenneth Branagh returns to reprise his role as Hercule Poirot in this follow-up to 2017’s adaptation of Murder on the Orient Express. The adaptation of Agatha Christie’s Death on the Nile isn’t as successful, in part due to source material not being as strong this time around and in part for some questionable creative decisions.

It takes far too long to get to the setting for our murder mystery, let alone the murder itself. By the time the body has dropped more than half the film seems to have already passed. In a somewhat defiant attempt to justify the character’s look in the previous film, Branagh opens with a flashback explaining the reasoning behind Poirot’s ridiculous mustache. After jumping forward, we are given multiple scenes setting up various characters, both in London and in Egypt, before finally get them all together on a ship sailing down the Nile River.

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How I Met Your Father – FOMO

/ / Television Reviews
  • Title: How I Met Your Father – FOMO
  • IMDb: link

The spin-off brings the characters back together in a cliched romcom misunderstanding as Valentina (Francia Raisa) tries to set up her boyfriend with the guys the met in the “Pilot” episode to widen his social circle, leading to Jesse (Christopher Lowell) and Sid (Suraj Sharma) mistakenly believing it’s a setup for Jesse and Sophie (Hilary Duff). There’s not much of interest here in the swanky New York night club that looks like a cheap set, with Sophie and Jesse eventually agreeing to be friends while teasing the idea that they may possibly be a match for each other (i.e. Ted and Robin) when the time is right. Despite the subpar writing, Duff is doing her best to keep the show afloat, but she’s going to need help if this show is going to have any chance to become more than a trivia question.

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Naomi – Zero to Sixty

/ / Television Reviews
  • Title: Naomi – Zero to Sixty
  • IMDb: link

While searching for answers about herself and her connection to the mysterious disc, Naomi McDuffie (Kaci Walfall) gets stuck in a bit of cliched teenager loop getting herself into trouble and not coming clean to her parents about the reasons why. As for her parents, despite initially seeming to have no conception of their adopted daughter’s origins, “Zero to Sixty” seems to quickly reverse course for the series (even if the big reveal is far less impressive or emotional that what we got in the original comic).

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