Action

Kick-Ass

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Kick-Ass
  • IMDB: link

“How come nobody’s ever tried to become a super-hero?”

From one idle comment thrown out to his two friends (Clark Duke, Evan Peters) at the local comic shop begins a dream that will quickly turn into a nightmare. Into every life a little ass kicking must fall. There are those who kick the ass, and others who get theirs kicked. Based on the comic series by Mark Millar and John Romita, Jr. Marvel Comics’ latest adaptation takes us into the world of an unremarkable teen with a remarkable idea.

Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson) decides the world could use a super-hero, and why not him? Ordering a scuba suit and a pair of billy clubs online, our new hero (under the moniker “Kick-Ass”) quickly proceeds to get his ass handed to him in all manner of ways. His attempt to stop a pair of thugs from boosting a car doesn’t exactly go as planned. The outcome leaves our hero stabbed, beaten, hit by a moving car, and naked in the back of an ambulance. Ouch!

…

Kick-AssRead More »

Kick-Ass Read More »

How to Train Your Dragon

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: How to Train Your Dragon
  • IMDb: link

Aside from the fact that How to Train Your Dragon includes Vikings and dragons it’s very similar to many teenage comedies Hollywood has put out over the years. Hiccup (Jay Baruchel) is your typical Ugly Duckling character. Although the term “nerd” is never uttered it’s fair to say if the Vikings had a word for Hiccup this would be the modern translation. On the Viking island of Berk the clumsy Hiccup is as far from the Viking ideal as one could get, and a constant irritation to his father (Gerard Butler).

Much like nerds of our era, Hiccup struggles with his ineptitude. He thinks too much, makes crazy inventions, and is the butt of jokes by not only the gang his own age but everyone in the village. And, of course, our hero has a crush on a girl (America Ferrera) who’s everything he’s not: athletic, self-assured, and a true warrior. Though he might not be a typical Viking, Hiccup does want to take part in his peoples’ most important mission – fighting dragons. After trapping a dragon with one of his many inventions Hiccup is unable to kill the wounded creature and instead decides to try and help the creature fly once more.

…

How to Train Your DragonRead More »

How to Train Your Dragon Read More »

End of Days – Armageddon: The Day After 2012

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: 2012
  • IMDb: link

I didn’t expect much from director Roland Emmerich’s latest disaster flick other than a little dumb fun. 2012 couldn’t even deliver that.

What follows is a short, and hopefully concise, review for a long, and depressingly boring, film (158-minute running time) that is almost as much fun as spending three hours alone in a doctor’s waiting room.

Maybe it was asking too much of Emmerich to give us another big disaster flick (after all, it’s not like 10,000 B.C. did anyone any favors). The man who gave us Independence Day, The Day After Tomorrow, and that woeful Godzilla remake, it seems, has nothing new to share. Instead he brings back the same tired storylines, with new actors and larger special effects, in hopes that this alone will be enough to satisfy.

It’s not.

…

End of Days – Armageddon: The Day After 2012Read More »

End of Days – Armageddon: The Day After 2012 Read More »

Lucky Number “9”

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: 9
  • IMDb: link

9-posterAdapted by creator Shane Acker from the short film of the same name, and produced by Tim Burton (who knows a thing or too about creepy and unconventional animated films), comes 9.

CGI animation in the style of stop-motion, Acker’s film is a breath of fresh air in both style and story. If you enjoyed Coraline earlier this year then this one’s for you. Here’s a good story beautifully rendered and not afraid to inspire both fear and awe in younger viewers.

Rather than take time to explain the world and its rules (i.e. talk down to its audience), as would happen in well over 90% of animated films (and close to 100% of kid’s films), we’re thrown right into the middle of the action.

The story begins with birth into a world of death. This is a post-apocalyptic world populated only by small puppet figures and dangerous mechanical beasts. We discover the world through the eyes of the newly created 9 (Elijah Wood).

…

Lucky Number “9”Read More »

Lucky Number “9” Read More »

G.I. JOE: Rise of CRAP

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
  • IMDb: link

gi-joe-rise-of-cobra-posterLet’s get this straight right from the get-go: I had no real expectations with this film except wanting to leave without getting too bored or having the film make my eyes bleed. One out of two isn’t bad. Even with the bar set so low G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra finds a way to slither underneath like champion limbo dancer Hermes Conrad.

Based on a toy line and 80’s television show Rise of Cobra plays like one long Michael Bay action reel (think The Rock, if it were directed by Zack Snyder). It’s got the brains of the old cartoon down cold (ridiculous premise, tons of vehicles and ammunition) but hardly any of its style.

It doesn’t help the Cobra never really exists in this film. Instead we’re given a well-funded unnamed group of terrorists. It is also problematic that the baddie chosen to put center stage isn’t Cobra Commander (almost completely absent from the film), or even the unmasked Destro (Christopher Ecclestion), but the Baroness (Sienna Miller, because I guess Kate Beckinsale was too expensive).

…

G.I. JOE: Rise of CRAPRead More »

G.I. JOE: Rise of CRAP Read More »