Movie Reviews

To Infinity, And Beyond

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: WALL-E
  • IMDB: link

It’s not easy being an animation fan today.  It’s obvious that a fraction of the animated film is anything but pure corporate product.  Disney has lost its way.  AFI named Shrek one of the top ten animated films of all time (WTF?)  I might totally give up on the genre if if weren’t for two names – Hayao Miyazaki, and Pixar.  In the thirteen years since the latter released Toy Story, the already-legendary picture house has yet to produce a bad film.  And after WALL·E, the studio’s ninth and quite possibly best film, all of the shortcomings of the animation industry suddenly seem so easy to overlook.

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To Infinity, And BeyondRead More »

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Ain’t Violence Grand?

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Wanted
  • IMDb: link

“Your father died yesterday on the rooftop of the Metropolitan Building.  He was one of the greatest assassins who ever lived, and the other one is behind you.”

Stuck in a dead-end job with a girlfriend (Kristen Hager) who’s cheating on him with his best friend (Chris Pratt), a ball-busting boss (Lorna Scott), and a general sense of utter futility, Wesley Gibson (James McAvoy) is not just having a bad year, but a bad life.

All this changes when he’s approached by a beautiful woman called the Fox (Angelina Jolie) who informs him his father, the greatest assassin to ever live, has just been killed and the man responsible (Thomas Kretschmann) is now gunning for him.  Wesley finds himself thrown into a world he never imagined.

The Fraternity of Assassins led by Sloan (Morgan Freeman) shows Wesley he has the special talent and abilities of his father which make him a perfect candidate for the Fraternity.

Choosing to give-up his old life Wesley jumps into the training which basically entails him getting the ever-living-snot beat out of him over and over again.  He trains to become the world’s best assassin able to bend bullets fired from his gun and kill from even miles away.

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Ain’t Violence Grand?Read More »

Ain’t Violence Grand? Read More »

Wanted…Less Much Less

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Wanted
  • IMDB: link

I went after Wanted with full force. I was really looking forward to a little James McAvoy action and honestly I used to think Angelina was hot, but now she truly needs to invest in a donut factory and eat up. Sadly every time I got a good look at James or even a decent action shot he looked constipated in slow motion, that wasn’t too hot. And the slow motion blood splatters and bullets going through the human skulls, a little over done and too much computer work.

Wesley Gibson (James McAvoy ), a bored account manager, starts with a voice over about how much he hates his job, best friend, girlfriend and ultimately his life. His job is setting in a cubicle with a fat redhead breathing down his neck with a stapler demanding results and being totally obnoxious. His girlfriend is screwing his only friend and he doesn’t have the balls to confront him about it, so instead he provides condoms so his buddy can continue banging his girlfriend over lunch. His life is the same shit day in and day out, till an assassin bites it and they come for him.

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Wanted…Less Much Less Read More »

Missed It By That Much

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Get Smart
  • IMDB: link

“I am not completely incompetent.”

Maxwell Smart (Steve Carell) is an analyst for CONTROL, a secret underground spy organization.  Although intelligent, Max is clumsy, awkward, and is known for the mind-numbing level of detail he puts into his job.

When CONTROL is attacked by the terrorist organization known as KAOS, the Chief (Alan Arkin) has no choice but to make Max an agent and pair him with Agent 99 (Anne Hathaway), who has recently gone through plastic surgery (the reasons for which make less sense than anything else in the film), for an important mission.

That’s the basic outline of the plot, which never really seems to get developed past the outline stage.  The film instead provides situations for Carell to get himself and 99 both into and out of danger, almost always making a fool out of himself in the process.  Carell is good here, and there’s a nice playful chemistry which slowly develops with Hathaway.  And Alan Arkin, and Dwayne “Stop Calling Me The Rock” Johnson provide some nice moments as well.

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Missed It By That MuchRead More »

Missed It By That Much Read More »

A ‘Guru’ Only A Mother Could Love

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: The Love Guru
  • IMDB: link

About a month ago, a friend asked me, “Which are you dreading the least – You Don’t Mess With the Zohan or The Love Guru?”  It was a fitting question, as not only did the two movies look like the worst comedies of the summer, but they might have been the worst looking movies of the summer, regardless of genre.  I answered that Zohan looked a bit worse (Sandler‘s last film, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, still left a bad taste in my mouth) but now, having seen both films, I have a hard time deciding which one actually was worse.  All I know is that neither one is much of a winner.

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A ‘Guru’ Only A Mother Could Love Read More »