1.5 Razors

Season of the Witch

/ / Home Video
  • Title: Season of the Witch
  • IMDB: link

season-of-the-witch-blu-rayTwo Teutonic Knights (Nicolas Cage, Ron Perlman) who have grown weary of killing innocents and become deserters of the Crusades are given the chance to redeem themselves by transporting an accused witch (Claire Foy) to a far away monastery. The accused is charged with spreading the Black Death across the world.

Along for the ride are a priest (Stephen Campbell Moore), a knight (Ulrich Thomsen), an altar boy (Robert Sheehan) and a swindler (Stephen Graham) as their guide.

There are good Nic Cage films, silly but passable ones, and plenty of gawdawful crap. Season of the Witch fits in the last category. The nature of the witch is given away far too soon, and the twist of the true nature of her evil will seems nothing more than a forced attempt to raise the stakes of a film you’ve given up on long before its climax.

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Bait and Switch

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Friends with Benefits
  • IMDB: link

Friends with BenefitsThe idea of Mila Kunis starring in a raunchy sex comedy from the director who gave us the best male cheerleader recruitment film ever sounded promising. But for a film about casual sex Friends with Benefits, with the exception of a couple of early montages where our two leads spend 90% of their naked time together, is actually kind of impotent.

Dylan (Justin Timberlake) and Jamie (Kunis) meet cute when he comes to New York after she arranges a job interview for him at GQ through her role as a head-hunter. The two hit it off, and when Dylan decides to take the job they become fast friends.

After bonding over past relationship stories and beer one night the pair decide to try and be friends who occasionally use each other for sex. As almost always happens in movies like this things start out great but go downhill fast. This isn’t the first film to try using casual sex as the basis for a relationship film (it’s not even the first one this year), and despite failing rather spectacularly it’s sure not to be the last.

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Batman #710

/ / Comics

batman-710-coverFor an issue that is jam-packed with important events and characters I’m not quite sure how this issue of Batman is such a trainwreck. Two-Face returns to Gotham, but he’s not the only Dent who’s got a role to play.

We also get Batman (tiptoeing around like a ballet dancer on steroids thanks to Steve Scott’s art) attempting to deal with Kitrina Falcone and hunt down a psychotic Two-Face who is even more lost than usual without his trademark coin.

And then there’s the late reveal and final panel which returns Gilda Dent to Gotham as well, as the arm candy of Mario Falcone? Like everything else in this issue it takes a good idea and turns it into pure shock and filler without context or meaning.

I’ve read some bad Batman comics in my day, but this issue is such a clusterfuck it’s baffling to behold. Here’s hoping the title makes some swift changes and gets back on track as soon as possible.

[DC, $2.99]

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Country Strong

/ / Home Video
  • Title: Country Strong
  • IMDB: link

“Was [Townes Van Zandt] famous?”
“In some circles. But not as famous as Carrie Underwood.”

Coming out of rehab (again) country music star Kelly Canter (Gwyneth Paltrow) hits the road with her manager and husband (Tim McGraw), and two young aspiring stars (Garrett Hedlund, Leighton Meester) on a comeback tour.

The film’s running time is under two hours but it feels much longer as the characters and plot struggle to make their way to the story’s climactic performance in Dallas.

The performances are solid, but nothing special. The music is more country pop than country, and both Paltrow and Meester are adequate at performing them. However, neither the songs nor the performances will make you buy the soundtrack. And the story itself, aside from the ending (which serves up a very questionable message), is all to predictable.

Although the version I viewed contained no extras (not even the trailer was included), some version do include deleted scenes, the film’s original ending, an extended musical performance, and cast and crew featurettes.

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Green Lantern #62

/ / Comics

green-lantern-62-coverI will be so glad when Brightest Day is over. Hal Jordan and the rainbow corps come face-to-face with Krona (and get their asses handed to them in short order). Krona escapes with the entities and Hal wakes up hours later back on th JLA Satelitte with a concussion and broken ribs just in time for a scolding from Batman.

Needing all the help he can get Hal immediately turns down Superman, Batman, and the Flash (who all agree to help), and promptly disappears with the rainbow corps back into space.

There’s so much wrong with this issue I don’t know where to begin. The story is just gawdaful. Hal’s refusal of help makes no sense for a guy who’s known to use whatever advantage and leverage he can get over the years. Nor does his protection of Atrocitus given his most recent murderous offenses on Earth. I’ve also got to complain about the inconsistency of Doug Mahnke’s artwork over the issue – he can’t even get Batman’s costume right (he puts Bruce into Dick Grayson‘s costume).

[$2.99]

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