May 2019

Godzilla: King of the Monsters

  • Title: Godzilla: King of the Monsters
  • IMDb: link

Godzilla: King of the Monsters movie reviewGodzilla: King of the Monsters is a big dumb action movie, dumb being the operative word. The full title may as well be Godzilla: King of the Monsters, Humans: Dumbest Fucks on the Planet. Even for a horror movie, the motivations and decision making of every single human character, from child to soldier to politician, are stuptifying. Seriously, you begin to wonder how people this dumb don’t drown in the shower or walk directly into traffic. (And some of them are supposed to be scientists?!) In a series that continues to place a large amount of focus on the human storylines adjacent to the creatures, Godzilla: King of the Monsters makes you wonder if the human race is even worth saving.

The movie is also filled with innumerable plotholes, continuity problems, a misunderstanding of distances across the globe and the time to navigate them, timeline problems, and plenty of insane choices from every character presented on screen. The monsters, however, are pretty cool. It’s just a shame that the movie only really works when two or more are battling on-screen (which, sadly, takes place during far less of the film’s running time than it should).

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Blood & Treasure – Code of the Hawaladar

  • Title: Blood & Treasure – Code of the Hawaladar
  • IMDb: link

Blood & Treasure - Code of the Hawaladar TV review

As Farouk (Oded Fehr) searches for Cleopatra’s tomb, Danny (Matt Barr) and Lexi (Sofia Pernas) continue searching for Farouk. Believing tracing the money Shaw (Michael James Shaw) was to be paid to be their best lead, Danny takes the arms dealer’s place. Sadly, things don’t go according to plan when Danny is recognized as a former agent of the FBI. Thankfully, Danny has better bargaining methods than the local police in getting the information they need as the series continues to showcase him as the white knight compared to Lexi’s more gray leanings. The episode also builds in a little more time for Father Chuck (Mark Gagliardi) who is able to offer separate assistance to both Lexi and Danny and also sees another casualty when Asim (Patrick Sabongui) is killed on the raid of Farouk’s safe house.

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DuckTales – The Duck Knight Returns!

  • Title: DuckTales – The Duck Knight Returns!
  • wiki: link

DuckTales - The Duck Knight Returns! television review

Reintroduced as a the title character of Launchpad‘s (Beck Bennett) favorite show, “The Duck Knight Returns!” features Jim Cummings reprising his role, this time as the actor Jim Starling who played the character Darkwing Duck on television. Relegated to small-time promotional efforts, Starling is at first ecstatic to learn of a new Darkwing Duck movie… at least until learning that he is not part of the project from director Alistair Boorswan (Edgar Wright). Teamed-up with his favorite hero, Launchpad will try and help Darkwing break into the studio and set things right… until he discovers that the new actor Drake Mallard (Chris Diamantopoulos) far more epitomizes the ideals of the Darkwing Duck than the bitter and selfish Starling.

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Charlie’s Angels – Bullseye

  • Title: Charlie’s Angels – Bullseye
  • wiki: link

Charlie's Angels - Bullseye television review

Today’s Throwback Thursday post takes us back to the tale of three beautiful former police detectives turned private detectives working for a faceless boss known as Charlie. Murder on the firing range sends the Angels undercover in Women’s Army Corps. While Kelly (Jaclyn Smith) and Jill (Farrah Fawcett) show up as new recruits, Sabrina (Kate Jackson) takes on the role of a nurse. Even if the episode hadn’t started with revealing the killer to the audience, the sadistic Drill Sgt. Billings (L.Q. Jones) is the obvious suspect. He doesn’t take to kindly to people snooping through his office as Kelly learns when he sabotages her gas mask during a training exercise. Later, Jill learns the same lesson when she is taken prisoner by the soldier as his ticket off the base.

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