More Video Game Movie Mediocrity
- Title: Hitman
- IMDb: link
What’s Thanksgiving without a turkey? Hitman is exactly is good as you would expect from a flick adapted off a series of video games. It’s not the mind-numbing disaster Doom was (thank God! read that review), but it’s not exactly good either.
Timothy Olyphant stars as “Agent 47,” a bald hitman with a bar code stamped on the back of his head. He works for a secret organization performing assassination and murder for hire, that is until (for no apparent reason) he’s sold out by the people who own him and he goes on the run with a whore (Olga Kurylenko) owned by the man he must kill and avoid capture by the Interpol agent on his tail (Dougray Scott).
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As a kid I had Transformers toys, I watched the television series without fail, and collected the original Marvel Comics Transformers series (all 80 issues and those lame cross-over mini-series too!). So the fanboy in me was ecstatic when I learned that a live-action film of the comics, television show, and toys I grew up with was going to be attempted. But when I heard that 
This movie’s got disaster written all over it. The acting is average, the plot is ridiculous, and the dialogue will have you laughing and groaning. But it does have beautiful, and scantily clad, young actresses, some nice sets and attractive scenery, and some pretty good stunts and wire work. Fans of B-movies, and adolescent teens, might find a film that that can laugh-at and enjoy yourself while doing so. Is it a good film? Not really. Is it a good time? For the right audience, yes it is.
The film begins, after a bizarre introduction about singing coins and eight pieces of nine (don’t ask) which is never satisfactorily explained, with Will (
I stand by my assessment that